One of the MANY questions: “We would rather save toward our first home or our honeymoon than register for gifts we don’t really need. Is that okay?”

Yes, it’s perfectly okay to encourage guests to help with any gift that would be most meaningful to you.  It’s always acceptable for a guest to give a gift of money if they wish; the difference now is that couples are the ones requesting money.  Spread your preference by word of mouth, making sure that your wedding party, along with your close friends and family, know what you’d like. Say something like, “We’d love anything you choose, but we’re hoping to work toward a down payment on our first home and would love help with that.”  Its best when requesting money to let guests know what the funds are going toward – your honeymoon, your first home, furniture sets.  Many people feel more comfortable if they know they’re giving toward a tangible gift, rather than padding a bank account.  If saying “money” or “cash” feels too awkward to you, you can use euphemisms such as “help with,” “donation” or “contribution.”   Just remember that, ultimately, the choice of gift is always up to the giver.  Some people may not be comfortable giving a donation to a less-traditional gift.  Be sure they know that you value their gift as much as anyone else’s.

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